Thomas the Magical Elf
One cloudy rainy day Thomas was out for a leisurely stroll in the neighbourhood. Thomas lived in a village called Elfington; this village was not a normal elf village, it was always rainy, snowy, and cloudy and the weather was always nasty. Thomas was 11 and a half years old, had big pointy ears and blond hair. He also attended Elfington Short, the cities only school where all 556 kids in the whole town attended. When kids in Elfington turned 11, they awaited the day when they turned 11 and three quarters. In Elfington, when you officially turned 11 and three quarters you went to Milton who lived on the far side of town to get your super power.
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“Beep, beep, beep”, that’s how Thomas awoke on April 23. He was tired and he could feel a lump in his throat every time he swallowed and then he could hear his mother yelling from the kitchen below, “Thomas happy 11 and three quarters!” That’s when he suddenly remembered, today was the day that he got to skip school to go see
He could see it now, in between the two big willow trees and on the grassy hill, the rain now raining so swiftly it was pouring down sideways. Thomas was more nervous than ever as he knocked on the big wooden door. It took about 13 seconds for an answer, but then he arrived at the door, short like all the elves, but with a great elderly and superior essence about him. He had a medium length long white beard, round glasses, a long pointy nose, and he was wearing midnight blue robes down to his feet. Thomas got chills up his spine, he had waited all his life to get his special power from
The walls in
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Thomas awoke the next morning slowly opening his eyes, he could feel no pain in any part of his body, and every part felt very much alive. He felt sleepy, but lifted his head up and looked around, he was in a white room, and had multiple numbers of wires attached to his wrists. “Thomas! My goodness am I happy your alright I thought we’d lost you.” Thomas was confused and curious as to what he was doing in the hospital and why he was here, groggily Thomas asked, “What happened?” “Well” replied Thomas’s mom replied, “We aren’t exactly sure what happened, but we think its another case of the 11 and three quarters disease, sometimes if your birthday isn’t soon enough, your body might decide to give you your own special power.” “Lucky for you, you were with
Thomas’s face dropped, he had been told the gift wouldn’t be a good one, but this was unbelievable. “Thomas I know it’s not the best gift, but.” Thomas face went blank, he was thinking, trying to think positive, this could be a good thing and then his face gained a tint of pink, as he thought in his mind, bad thing, bad thing, bad thing! “Oh” Thomas absolutely hated his gift, he was furious. He ripped off the wires on his wrist and let out and angry scream of pain as the wires and needles ripped out of his skin, antibiotics flying everywhere. “Thomas stop! What are you doing?!” Thomas was in a rage of anger and was not happy. He raced around the room knocking things from shelves onto the floor, loud crashes and bangs filled the room. It was about one hour later that Thomas finally settled down back to his normal self. Apparently Thomas was unaware of his strange strength when he got angry, he was like the hulk but Thomas wasn’t green and Thomas was also just a tiny little elf. Thomas was sure that the vision gift would be terrible, but with the great strength he now had he didn’t care as much anymore, the gift he was given would do and he was happy with it. Thomas thanked
Thomas was sitting in the back of his mother’s slow, blue station wagon when his mother suddenly yelled. “FIRE, FIRE!” Thomas started to giggle and then through his giggles managed to get out, “Sorry Mom, just trying out my new special talent.” “Thomas!” his mother shrieked “That is a dangerous thing to do, Thomas you’re as silly as a goat!” After a few short minutes of being home again, Thomas noticed his large need for something too eat so he happily skipped over to the kitchen to make a grilled cheese sandwich, to his disappointment that was no cheese that Thomas liked. Luckily for Thomas with his new super power he could make anything look and taste delicious.
Hello Lorin... This is Hailey George, I am Mrs. Marren-Reitsma's student helper. This is an awesome story! You have a very vivid imagination, there is a lot of detail and thought put into this! I love how you have made it extremely unique, with the detail of the town to the age that one has to be to receive their special powers. I think that the over-all message of this story is that you need to take what you have and make it the best... "he could make anything look and taste delicious." From reading the part where he was in his fit of rage in the hospital, to his acceptance, and then Thomas' delight to his super-power tells the story of life. When someone is speaking, it is supposed to be a whole new paragraph, I found it a little bit confusing trying to decipher who was talking and who they were talking to. Over all, you are a beautiful writer with an amazing imagination, there was clear detail to the town, to Martin's room, the hospital, everything! I had a very percice imagine in my head while reading this. It was a delight to read your story, keep up the good work! :)
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